-gather up these thoughts-
stitch them together with a prickly needle
into a tatty blanket
taken to the bazaar
away from me
to sell
for a dollar each.
Leave me
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it's purple time again... wee! seems like i have to iron out a lot of things with many people. perhaps it's me, really, who causes all the problem. i dunno. it has come to the point where my brain is just too tired to think. to think hu's fault isit anyway? to my fellow planet of the apes resident: no wait. nah. i guess you could always guess if you wanted to. it's too hurtful to point them out. i dun really mean it. now. but right when i wrote it. i did. ok... you wanna know what you have done to piss me off? there was this blog entry of yours talking about prom night? and the last part was something about being overprotective. if that was about me. den yes. i was/am pissed about that. that's like total assumption on your part. if it is indeed about me, that is. which i have really no inkling about. i remember my primary school math teacher telling us a joke/non-joke about the word 'assume'. split it up and it appears to have become 'ass-u-me'. lets try not to make and ass of you and me. i guess we've both done that a lot for the past months... but then again. it's not that easy saying what you really wanna say.isit? and no. it's not a chore for me to talk to you. you know what's a chore? it is to try to pretend that you're not there and to ignore you. it's suffocating. literally. i feel as though my windpipes are contracting. it's horrible. i wonder whether you feel it too. few people annoy me. and ure definitely not one of them. minus the sacarsm dat is. i guess dats it. what else can there be said online? it's us whom we each need to speak to. not type furiously on the keyboard. monday, we'll get our results and the thing is i might go to a poly, so i guess if things dun work out, at least we'll possibly never see each other again. woo pee dooo! haha.. nah. am kidding. it'll be great to be crazy monkeys fleeing from the zoo again. remember your 'date with the orang utan' sticker? ;)
honestly, if u wan me to point out the flaws that you have? i feel as though im not qualified enough to do it. i have my own flaws too. who am i to point yours out? but i could try and hope that i would not sound too much like a biatch. try. i say. it's just... i feel that sometimes you are sooo guarded. you know? like you build this fortress around you and you dun let anyone penetrate it. even though you might act fine in front of everyone, your blog says it all. sacarsm's the major ingredient. sometimes i jus wonder. can she just relax? can she like stop thinking so much about other people's motives? can she just say what she really means? cos it has come to the point that i no longer trust what comes out of your mouth. not in the sense that you're lying.... more like. you say one thing, but it becomes almost certain to me that your heart's thinking something else. no?
the really strange thing is.... i never noticed this side of you before the episode happened. really. it was as though there was a screen between us. a good one. a screen which blocked out whatever i didn't want to see or experience. tis' probably fault on my part. for i have became an oversensitive ninny after 'what happened'. it's hard not to be... y'know?
i'm always willing to try and i've never really hated anyone before. it's just not in me. ure still my friend. indefinitely. unless you take away with all my money. dats a different story. noe wad? it scares more shit outta me when i dun have an inkling what you are thinking about. basically cos ure more capable of sacarsm and words of poison than i am. you have to know. what ever that i have written on tis blog that's been targeted at you, i forget about it the moment i click Publish Post. the hurt's still there, but not hate. as we are talking about this matter i guess you would like to know which posts are directed at you. but do u really wanna noe...? just in case you do.
Main Entry: pL's blog
Function: Noun
Definition: pL's online diary; a personal chronological log of her thoughts published on a Web page; also called pL's Weblog, Web log
Example:
(Click thumbnail to enlarge the image of the blog)